Everybody’s got a story when it comes to munchkin gamers. They are the reason most convention-run games have pre-gens. They are also one of the highest causes of stress in a gaming environment a GM or player can face. Suffice it to say, if Steve Jackson writes a game parodying your existence, you’ve reached the level of epic problem in the hobby.

I suppose most of us at one time or another entertained the idea of or indulged in munchkin behavior. Consider it. Sure it’s well beneath you now, but in your past, perhaps when you were young, it was all about what you could accumulate rather than how your character or the campaign developed. Did you ever describe your character by starting with “Well, he’s (she’s) got a +5 Holy Avenger (Longbow, Demonslayer, whatever), Full Plate +5… blah blah blah blah blah” or perhaps mentioning some treasured and rare artifact that’s equally BLAH? If you did that, you suffered a bout with munchkinism. Most of us grew out of this in our early teenage years, but not all of us and it’s to those I’m referring in this article.

In my now decades of running and playing RPG’s, I’ve had the displeasure to be exposed to a whole variety of munchkin gamers. I suppose the question most people have when encountering one is to wonder why. Why are they doing this to my group/game? Do they get off on it? Do they have some inferiority complex that requires them to try and prove they’re better or that they can always win? Didn’t they grow out of it years ago like everyone else? I have yet to find the answer to this. All I can say with any degree of certainty is that if you aren’t one, you’re best hope is for you and/or your group to survive them and if you are one, well, I hope you’re enjoying World of Warcraft. Watch I say that and people will complain I’m picking on Warcraft. I play it too people. It’s called Warcrack for a reason.

How did we handle them in the old days? Well, a bar of soap in a sock did wonders…oh, you’re probably wondering more about in group setting. Mostly given that these were friends of ours we tolerated them to some degree and all stewed as we watched them try and ruin our GM’s (or my) carefully crafted setting. Then it became of game of making that player’s character miserable and ensuring that things happened to it that no amount of maxing hit points and equipment would solve; petty I will admit but immensely satisfying. The other option was, and this usually wrecked whatever campaign we were in, to join them. If they couldn’t be stopped, we would all go into this virtual arms race to see who could outdo the little treasure, sometimes with the assistance of the GM. The satisfaction of this avenue was also short-lived.

If such persons are irredemable in their quest to acquire as much loot as possible or be the most powerful player just to say they are, then often your option is simply to cut bait and move on. Some people, you just can’t reach (cue Struther). Ostracizing a friend or an otherwise good acquaintance isn’t a fun thing, but having them in your game environment just breeds animosity and contempt, so which is preferable?

That said, in another light the existence of perpetual munchkins does provide some of the best gaming stories out there. I shall never forget one almost archtypical example of the species who in his waning years in our group tried to consistently build characters who were “like a Jedi, but tougher”. Don’t get me started on the number of miraculously successful rolls that were made on such characters as well. Not like rolls don’t get fudged during any given game, but when you’re known for fudging every single roll, again that’s the kind of thing that indicates a problem.

If you have similar stories, I always like to hear them, so please sound off in comments. If I think up any, and I try not to on the advice of qualified mental health professionals, I’ll do the same and expand on the post.

Advertisements